Don't Learn The Hard Way
My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding,
that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge.
…[lest you] say, “How I hated discipline, and my heart despised reproof!
I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors. I am at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation.”
-Prov. 5:1-2, 12-14
Well, we just dove right in this week, didn’t we? No more pretty, happy “wisdom is so great, let’s skip through the fields of wisdom together.” Now we’re in the nitty gritty, hard work of what obtaining and and seeking after wisdom really means.
First up: sexual temptation and purity. Bam. Solomon doesn’t waste any time diving into the tough stuff. (P.S.-thank you, Charlie, for tackling that one directly so I don’t have to. Ahem.)
To take a slightly different angle off of yesterday’s topic, the more general warnings in the verses above bring to mind the statement, “having to learn the hard way.” I think most of us would say that we would use that statement to describe ourselves, at least at some point in our lives, about any number of situations or issues (including, but not limited to, sexual temptation).
It’s almost as if that statement has become a source of pride about not taking advice or direction from others around us. It’s so much easier to wear that statement as some sort of badge of honor rather than submit ourselves to trusted counsel and accountability. It’s a teenager-type, “I know everything, I don’t need help” mindset. And it’s the opposite of wisdom.
Solomon’s counsel in this chapter is firm and urgent. He’s trying to impress upon the reader the absolute importance of heeding wise counsel in order to avoid the “utter ruin” referred to in verse 14.
As a real-life example of this, I have had the opportunity a few times to mentor first-year or student teachers. Some have eagerly accepted my advice, emailed me many times with questions, soaked up ideas like a sponge. Others have half-listened, smiled, and then done what they wanted to do, ignoring my advice and suggestions. Now, I don’t pretend to be the world’s best special ed. Teacher, but I have taught for 10 years, and I have learned a thing or two. Some things I was able to learn from mentors also, and some things I had to figure out on my own. But the things I did have to “learn the hard way,” I don’t want other people to have to do the same. I want to share what I’ve learned, so that they are successful and do not come to ruin.
Submitting to counsel and instruction can be very difficult, particularly when it goes against what our flesh wants. The great news is, as believers and followers of Christ, we already have victory over the areas in which we’re prideful or that our flesh wars against. Jesus’ death and resurrection means we don’t have to fall into utter ruin (and if we have, He provides redemption and grace and a way out of that ruin). In some cases, I believe that God uses trustworthy advisors and mentors in our lives to lead us even further toward redemption and sanctification and away from ruin.
So my prayer and challenge for us today, Church, is that we are not people who insist on learning the hard way. That we pray for hearts that do not “hate discipline” or “despise reproof.” I pray that we instead check our hearts when we receive advice or counsel we don’t like at first. That we’re willing to “be attentive,” engage it, pray through it, and if necessary, submit to it with humility and trust.
- Connie
that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge.
…[lest you] say, “How I hated discipline, and my heart despised reproof!
I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors. I am at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation.”
-Prov. 5:1-2, 12-14
Well, we just dove right in this week, didn’t we? No more pretty, happy “wisdom is so great, let’s skip through the fields of wisdom together.” Now we’re in the nitty gritty, hard work of what obtaining and and seeking after wisdom really means.
First up: sexual temptation and purity. Bam. Solomon doesn’t waste any time diving into the tough stuff. (P.S.-thank you, Charlie, for tackling that one directly so I don’t have to. Ahem.)
To take a slightly different angle off of yesterday’s topic, the more general warnings in the verses above bring to mind the statement, “having to learn the hard way.” I think most of us would say that we would use that statement to describe ourselves, at least at some point in our lives, about any number of situations or issues (including, but not limited to, sexual temptation).
It’s almost as if that statement has become a source of pride about not taking advice or direction from others around us. It’s so much easier to wear that statement as some sort of badge of honor rather than submit ourselves to trusted counsel and accountability. It’s a teenager-type, “I know everything, I don’t need help” mindset. And it’s the opposite of wisdom.
Solomon’s counsel in this chapter is firm and urgent. He’s trying to impress upon the reader the absolute importance of heeding wise counsel in order to avoid the “utter ruin” referred to in verse 14.
As a real-life example of this, I have had the opportunity a few times to mentor first-year or student teachers. Some have eagerly accepted my advice, emailed me many times with questions, soaked up ideas like a sponge. Others have half-listened, smiled, and then done what they wanted to do, ignoring my advice and suggestions. Now, I don’t pretend to be the world’s best special ed. Teacher, but I have taught for 10 years, and I have learned a thing or two. Some things I was able to learn from mentors also, and some things I had to figure out on my own. But the things I did have to “learn the hard way,” I don’t want other people to have to do the same. I want to share what I’ve learned, so that they are successful and do not come to ruin.
Submitting to counsel and instruction can be very difficult, particularly when it goes against what our flesh wants. The great news is, as believers and followers of Christ, we already have victory over the areas in which we’re prideful or that our flesh wars against. Jesus’ death and resurrection means we don’t have to fall into utter ruin (and if we have, He provides redemption and grace and a way out of that ruin). In some cases, I believe that God uses trustworthy advisors and mentors in our lives to lead us even further toward redemption and sanctification and away from ruin.
So my prayer and challenge for us today, Church, is that we are not people who insist on learning the hard way. That we pray for hearts that do not “hate discipline” or “despise reproof.” I pray that we instead check our hearts when we receive advice or counsel we don’t like at first. That we’re willing to “be attentive,” engage it, pray through it, and if necessary, submit to it with humility and trust.
- Connie
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